I went out to my car after making coffee to see if
there was one more pack of cigarettes out there. yes!
it's cold here, but not too cold. the sky is clear
and the stars are so bright. the world is strikingly
beautiful these days. even when the pain was so bad
that I wanted to die, the world was closer than I'd
ever seen it. the mountains here are majestic all
the time. but it can seem as if it's a postcard after
a while. what I mean is when all of a sudden you
realize it's not a postcard.

or if it is, you start wondering who it's to.